Still here

So, money in the bank is non-existence, food is low and payday is 5 days away.

Not an unusual thing around here, now that I have my 10 year old grandson living with me.

That being said, not a lot of healthy eating happening. Since he got tired of all the plain boring pasta with butter, he's been eating a lot of waffles. He won't eat the canned or even the homemade chili from the freezer, so that's what I've had. Really, chili is not so bad and I feel fine that I'm getting something healthy.  I had refrigerator oatmeal for lunch yesterday, it was a nice change of pace.

I put in some frozen blueberries and banana slices, along with ground flax seed and chia seeds. Healthy, right?

I was worried about all the pasta, but this morning I found I lost the extra 3 pounds I recently gained.

I really am putting forth an extra effort not to eat late at night, have just one helping of dinner and avoid late night snacking...OK, OK, no late night meals!

I look in the mirror and get so upset for letting this happen to myself.

Seems I've always had a problem with my weight since puberty. I've been able to lose it pretty good when I set my mind to it, but as soon as stressful stuff in life happens to me, I gain it back. Lately it's gotten really bad and now that I am in menopause, it's really hard to lose. I know I have to increase my exercise and sitting around all day on the weekends and all night after work is not doing me any good.

I hate the way I look, and honestly, it keeps me from going places. I keep to myself at home often and don't go out unless I have to.

Pretty sad, isn't it?

I still have a plan to buy a rowing machine. I researched and found this will give me a pretty good workout all over. Now I just have to afford it.

Who knows when that will be.